Dear Customers: Yes, I know your not from around here, but anyone with common sense would stay indoors the day after 15 inches of snow fall and when it's supposed to continue snowing all day. Not go harass the Wal*Mart workers.
Dear Customers: I'm sorry it takes so long for the managers and all the other associates to answer your calls, but we are on a bare bones staff, and do not complain to me about the snow seeing as I left my apt at 6am and got to work only 15 minutes early. I work at 7am, and I walked all of that. So I'm sorry everyone is taking to long, but be happy we're here at all.
Dear Customers: Yes, Wal*Mart is open, and yes, we are open on New Years, it's WAL*MART we're always open.
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Losing hope in humanity every hour
Dear Customers: Yes I know you're trying to get the best deal possible, but really? We can't and won't discount an already discounted item just because you said you found it in a lower marked spot and you tell us to mark it down for you.
Dear Customers: I know your so busy shopping and all, but would it be so bad to actually keep an eye on your children and keep them from peeping in on people and knocking over things.
Dear Customers: I know your so busy shopping and all, but would it be so bad to actually keep an eye on your children and keep them from peeping in on people and knocking over things.
Return of the Gifts
Dear Customers: Yes, this is Wal*mart, and yes we are open 24 hours. I just told you that when I answered your call.
Dear Customers: This is not the Weather Channel, stop asking me about the forecast for snow. Use the internet or the actual Weather Channel.
Dear Customers: All the Christmas stuff is half off, so yes, both of your formerly $8 items are $4 each. When I say ALL I don't mean every-other one, I mean ALL. So stop asking me to scan every single item you pick up.I am pretty sure you can see the 4 carts I have to organize of returns.
Dear Customers: Do you see that nice, perfectly organized cart that is quite obviously all Childrens stuff? Stop tossing all your crap in that one and either put it in the messed up cart, the already organized Adults cart, or take it back yourself.
Dear Customers: Yes, 6 clothes is the limit to what you can bring in, this does not mean you and your sister take rooms next to eachother and swap clothes under the doors. It means you only take in 6, you try them on, and then you leave. The fitting rooms are for everyone, not just you.
Dear Customers: This is not the Weather Channel, stop asking me about the forecast for snow. Use the internet or the actual Weather Channel.
Dear Customers: All the Christmas stuff is half off, so yes, both of your formerly $8 items are $4 each. When I say ALL I don't mean every-other one, I mean ALL. So stop asking me to scan every single item you pick up.I am pretty sure you can see the 4 carts I have to organize of returns.
Dear Customers: Do you see that nice, perfectly organized cart that is quite obviously all Childrens stuff? Stop tossing all your crap in that one and either put it in the messed up cart, the already organized Adults cart, or take it back yourself.
Dear Customers: Yes, 6 clothes is the limit to what you can bring in, this does not mean you and your sister take rooms next to eachother and swap clothes under the doors. It means you only take in 6, you try them on, and then you leave. The fitting rooms are for everyone, not just you.
Saturday, December 25, 2010
Christmas Eve was here
Dear Customers: I'm sorry we don't have the specific gift your son/daughter absolutely has to have, but it is Christmas eve and you decided to wait until the last minute.
Dear Customers: Yes, we close at 8, and yes, we will tell you several times that we close at 8, because it is 7.55 and you are STILL HERE.
Dear Customers: No, we will not be open 24 hours today or tomorrow, because we have lives and families too, and Christmas isn't just about shopping and goodies. It's about family and reflection.
Dear Customers: Yes, we close at 8, and yes, we will tell you several times that we close at 8, because it is 7.55 and you are STILL HERE.
Dear Customers: No, we will not be open 24 hours today or tomorrow, because we have lives and families too, and Christmas isn't just about shopping and goodies. It's about family and reflection.
Thursday, December 23, 2010
We're missing the Mad Hatter
Dear Customers: I know it's busy and we're a bit crowded, but does that really mean that RIGHT IN FRONT of me, you have the right to just pick up stuff and instead of using that extra second to put it back, I mean, you haven't even moved, you just toss it? Seriously, how hard is it to pick something up and then put it back?
Dear Customers: I don't care if your embarrassed by your grandma having a full on conversation with the fitting room worker, she's awesome and very sweet.
Dear Customers: I'm sorry that we don't have 38DD in anything other than "grandma bra's". Your the one with the huge boobs. Don't complain to the tiny worker who can still shop in the girls section. If you want cute things in big sizes, seriously, why are you at Wal*Mart? Why not a specialty store, or trying Khole's? They have like, everything there.
Dear Customers: No, we don't have anymore live trees, it's December 23rd, what else do you expect? Maybe you should have been smart and bought it earlier. And sorry that your tree died in a week, do you think it might have been your fault? That could have been a factor in that tree's untimely demise.
Dear Customers: I don't care if your embarrassed by your grandma having a full on conversation with the fitting room worker, she's awesome and very sweet.
Dear Customers: I'm sorry that we don't have 38DD in anything other than "grandma bra's". Your the one with the huge boobs. Don't complain to the tiny worker who can still shop in the girls section. If you want cute things in big sizes, seriously, why are you at Wal*Mart? Why not a specialty store, or trying Khole's? They have like, everything there.
Dear Customers: No, we don't have anymore live trees, it's December 23rd, what else do you expect? Maybe you should have been smart and bought it earlier. And sorry that your tree died in a week, do you think it might have been your fault? That could have been a factor in that tree's untimely demise.
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
Counting down the hours
Dear Customers: I understand that the holidays are a busy stressful time for everyone, but do you want to know something that will make the holidays better for everyone? Not yelling at the worker at 7am because she didn't find that T-shirt you grabbed without a UPC fast enough.
Dear Customers: Yes, we are just 'lowly' Wal*Mart workers, but the very least you could do is thank the associate who took the time out of their work to help you.
Dear Customers: Um, Yes, this is Wal*Mart, why are you repeating the number back to me and telling me this Wal*Marts number? You called it, and I answer the phones. It makes absolutely no sense to tell me the number I am answering for.
Dear Customers: Yes, we are just 'lowly' Wal*Mart workers, but the very least you could do is thank the associate who took the time out of their work to help you.
Dear Customers: Um, Yes, this is Wal*Mart, why are you repeating the number back to me and telling me this Wal*Marts number? You called it, and I answer the phones. It makes absolutely no sense to tell me the number I am answering for.
Monday, December 20, 2010
Holiday Mayhem
Dear Customers: You called Wal*Mart, you had people running all over the store for your one freaking item, and then we find you a pink ZuZu, which happens to be the last one in the store, and all you can say is "Oh, my son didn't want the bunny one." and hang up? Not even a thank you for your time?
Dear Customers: The weather is unpredictable, don't call at 8am and ask about if it's going to snow so you know if your daughter is safe to drive on the roads late in the afternoon. There is this amazing thing called the internet, use that next time instead.
Dear Customers: The weather is unpredictable, don't call at 8am and ask about if it's going to snow so you know if your daughter is safe to drive on the roads late in the afternoon. There is this amazing thing called the internet, use that next time instead.
Friday, December 17, 2010
Two days to catch up
Dear Customers: You ask one associate something, and since you don't like what they said, you turn around and ask me. What makes you think my response will be any different?
Dear Customers: While I admit it is hard being a parent and having time to teach your poor child every little thing, do you think you could atleast remember to teach them some manners?
Dear Customers: I work at Wal*Mart, not the weather channel or the news station. Don't ask me for the weather report or how the freeways are.
Dear Customers: What part of "Thank you for calling your 24 hour (my town here) Wal*Mart where we help you save money so you can live better, this is Casey how may I direct your call?" makes you think we are not 24 hours?
Dear Customers: While I admit it is hard being a parent and having time to teach your poor child every little thing, do you think you could atleast remember to teach them some manners?
Dear Customers: I work at Wal*Mart, not the weather channel or the news station. Don't ask me for the weather report or how the freeways are.
Dear Customers: What part of "Thank you for calling your 24 hour (my town here) Wal*Mart where we help you save money so you can live better, this is Casey how may I direct your call?" makes you think we are not 24 hours?
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
New Job!
Dear Customers: While I can give you the number to the new Super Wal*Mart in town, I will not give you mine, no matter how nicely you ask for it.
Dear Customers: While you may be deaf to the screams of your child that can be heard across the whole store, everyone else is not.
Dear Customers: Please don't check out the female workers while your wife is right next to you, that's just sleazy.
Dear Customers: while I appreciate that you are asking me where the fuzzy socks are, I advise you to turn around and actually look rather than just walk up and ask. They are in plain sight as you walk up to me.
Dear Customers: While you may be deaf to the screams of your child that can be heard across the whole store, everyone else is not.
Dear Customers: Please don't check out the female workers while your wife is right next to you, that's just sleazy.
Dear Customers: while I appreciate that you are asking me where the fuzzy socks are, I advise you to turn around and actually look rather than just walk up and ask. They are in plain sight as you walk up to me.
Catching up from Summer
Dear Customers: When you refer to a Mexican as 'you people' and tell us how we screw everything up, we take offense, and we will call you ignorant. Also, don't assume that just because someone's Mexican they can't be the manager.
Dear Customers: When I say "the price for a slice of pepperoni pizza is $3.99 after tax" don't ask me if that's after tax.
Dear Customers: If our lights are off, we have no food out, and we're cleaning, what makes you think we're still open?
Dear Customers: If I'm cleaning the glass and look uncomfortable with you standing not even a foot behind me and openly staring at me, what makes you think I'll be fine with you moving even closer?
Dear Customers: Yes, I have brown skin, no I do not speak Spanish.
Dear Customers: The first in line will always be served first, it doesn't matter if they're Mexican or White, Male or Female, so when you cut infront of two women and tell your son he should always let a woman go first, as you say this to the white woman and completely ignore the Mexican woman, you are sending the wrong message to your son.
Dear Customers: When you are standing in someone's blind spot and not making a sound, we are not ignoring you. If you are at the other end of where the line starts and standing about 5 feet away from the whole store, how are we supposed to know you want to order from us?
Dear Customers: Staring at someone's back will not make them cook your pizza faster, it will only creep out the worker and earn you nicknames. So Mr. McStarey and Miss Whine, order somewhere else.
Dear Customers: When we say we close in 15 minutes and this is all we have, this is all we have. It doesn't matter if you want pasta if we don't have it.
Dear Customers: Why do you wait for pizza to come out and then decide you want to just buy a whole pizza? You will have to just wait another 20 minutes anyways.
Dear Customers: When I say "the price for a slice of pepperoni pizza is $3.99 after tax" don't ask me if that's after tax.
Dear Customers: If our lights are off, we have no food out, and we're cleaning, what makes you think we're still open?
Dear Customers: If I'm cleaning the glass and look uncomfortable with you standing not even a foot behind me and openly staring at me, what makes you think I'll be fine with you moving even closer?
Dear Customers: Yes, I have brown skin, no I do not speak Spanish.
Dear Customers: The first in line will always be served first, it doesn't matter if they're Mexican or White, Male or Female, so when you cut infront of two women and tell your son he should always let a woman go first, as you say this to the white woman and completely ignore the Mexican woman, you are sending the wrong message to your son.
Dear Customers: When you are standing in someone's blind spot and not making a sound, we are not ignoring you. If you are at the other end of where the line starts and standing about 5 feet away from the whole store, how are we supposed to know you want to order from us?
Dear Customers: Staring at someone's back will not make them cook your pizza faster, it will only creep out the worker and earn you nicknames. So Mr. McStarey and Miss Whine, order somewhere else.
Dear Customers: When we say we close in 15 minutes and this is all we have, this is all we have. It doesn't matter if you want pasta if we don't have it.
Dear Customers: Why do you wait for pizza to come out and then decide you want to just buy a whole pizza? You will have to just wait another 20 minutes anyways.
The (re)start of sarcasm
Alrighty, well to those who are new and aren't popping up from Facebook, I started posting "Dear Customers" when I worked at Sbarros, in a casino. So I obviously got some intoxicated idiots there, and since I'm great with customer service, I would bottle up my sarcasm, and release it on Facebook. Well, this is the start of posts put up from my new job at Wally World, yup, Wal*Mart. So sit back, and for the first bit, we will catch y'all up on my summer posts, and then it'll be just about everyday I work I'll post.
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