No joke

Dear Customers: When I say my whole little speech at the beginning of every phone call, and you ask "is this (town I reside in)?" I will say "Yes, it is" and "No joke?" will be responded with a dead-pan "No joke". For crying out loud, I tell you what town Wally your calling when you call.

Dear Customers: Yes, 24 hours means that we do not close. So when I say that we are open 24 hours, don't ask me when we close.

Dear Customers: No, we do not have a brochure of our liquor, you have to get off your lazy alcoholic butt as look for yourself.

Dear Customers: I don't give a damn about your skin color, but if you insult my race right infront of me and then act like I should be fine, my tone will be cold with you. I don't care if you can't tell I'm Mexican. I'm MEXICAN dammit!

Dear Customers: Don't be rude to me just because my voice is scratchy and tired. I just finished hacking up a lung and am trying not to cough into the phone. Yes, I honestly don't care if your butt-hurt about us not having XL men's sweats, but when you say you want to talk to my boss, my response is 'alright, one moment'. That means stay on the line, not hang up. I honestly don't care after coughing up my lungs all day and you getting pissy at me. It's not my fault, and I feel very weak from coughing so hard.

Dear Customers: I'm a lowly associate, do you really think I can control things like ordering more gloves?